The worst kind of escort quest – Stealth

The worst kind of escort quest – Stealth

Okay We’re nearly through the pass. But in order to get the safety, we just have the sneak past this final band of guards But it’s really important. We stay really quiet and really stealthy Okay adventurer Thank you for taking me through these wild woods Make just keep it down. Okay. Okay stealth is my middle name Just keep it down Okay, so here’s the plan We’re gonna sneak past the guard on the left then we’re gonna head down the ridge line and distract the guard on the right and if we stick a tree to tree We should be able to avoid the final guard. The most important thing is that you stay behind me. What are you doing Eugene!?! Adventurer! Get back shhhh shhh I’m terrified! Shut up shut up shut up Adventurer where are you? Get back here These woods are so scary adventurer Get back behind me Adventurer I need your aid! Heeelp Heeelp Hey! Heeelp Heeeelp heeeeelp heeeeeelp Eugene shut up shut up shut up Adventurer there you are oh I was so frightened Why are you making such- shhhhhush Terribly scary forest adventurer Oh adventurer… Shut the F*** up shut the F*** up shut the f*** up! Why are you being so mean to me? *EPIC ANNOYING CRY* You there! You there! You there! You there! God I hate escort quests! We shall all be happy Shut up

Dereck Turner

100 thoughts on “The worst kind of escort quest – Stealth

  1. Henry L says:

    I've been playing Days gone lately. I was doing a stealth mission with a npc. The npc would just walk right in front of the enemy. I was in awe for a second, proceeded to continue the mission without a bit of concern for getting caught by the accompanying npc.

  2. L__VE To Worship says:


  3. DJ Syntic says:

    I was sure this skit was going to end with him doing a fade away and abandoning the quest.

  4. Minceir says:

    Don’t like certain game escort quests. While others can be okay.

  5. legnd300 says:

    Thus bringing the origin of “stay here” v. “Follow me” 😂

  6. Saint Kenny says:

    Okay adventure. Thank you for taking me through these wild woods! Just keep it down okay? Okay! Stealth is my middle name!

    Eugene is the best NPC impersonator!

  7. Ronney Meade says:

    1:55 is where i kill all npcs around me including the escorted npc and load a checkpoint

  8. booyaa kashaa says:

    escort quest bro

  9. Killer Ghost says:

    Abandon quest

  10. Black Ice says:

    I couldn't like until it was over. Too stressful lmao

  11. Alfred Knubble says:

    You've been Eugened!

  12. Cesar Rivas says:

    Brings back memories of scorting natalia on golden eye

  13. Raoul Duke says:

    Dying Light

  14. Richard Raab says:

    What kind of twat does a thumbs down on something like this?

  15. Henrik Skjolden says:

    Stealth is his middle name.

  16. Timothy Vasanthan says:

    Me: "takes out tape then tape the NPC's mouth, hand and leg and then takes out rope and tie the NPC and drags the NPC to finish quest*

  17. Kennis Ng says:

    Maybe ProphetZero should have helped Eugene "quick travel" to their destination.

  18. triadwarfare says:

    New takes on Escort quests is that it's impossible for NPCs to be detected even if they walk past the guards and the only way you could screw this up is to get yourself detected.

  19. Andrew Coates says:

    Congrats on 1.69 million subs

  20. Andrew Coates says:


  21. Rich Light says:

    Ohhhh. Did we just Eugene's 1st twinge of sentience???? That's the 1st time he has ever reacted to anything not programmed

  22. Rich Light says:

    By the way I pressed the button….. im still very very unhappy. Next time you say pressing a button will make me happy you better mean it
    In fact next time you tell me a button or better make me.bust a nut in my Jean's cuz now you owe me for false advertisement. Your lucky I dont sue. Now get to work on the orgasm button……. go , now , what the hell are you doing here. By the way that button could make us billionaires
    (Orgasm button ™ Rich light inc. ) lmao
    Women allready have one but my tongue gets so tired some times. Pretty sure they are living just so they get more than 1 hahahah.

  23. dan j says:

    I love the quest Were even if you fail it that you can still continue. Like in Assassin's Creed Odyssey where you can kill the quest Giver lol.

  24. Owen Kevin Drummond says:

    Morning nice day for stealthing ain’t it hu ha

  25. selfpreservationist says:

    That’s so true. I love it

  26. C493d says:

    This triggers me…

  27. Aretzky says:

    Something is broken here i can't find a skip button 😀

  28. cannibalbananas says:

    I hate escort quests when you have to keep the other person alive. i.e. when they don't move off and wait for you like in Fable, but instead get attacked/ or actively join the fight like Dragon Age

  29. Red T says:

    Calmly escorting an NPC through an area. NPC diverts to attack random mob who had been standing there, minding its own business.
    Same NPC: Adventurer! Help me!
    Me: Dammit, you idiot. I wanna just let you deal with the mess you made, but then I'd have to wait for you to respawn and start the quest over.

  30. funncubesde says:

    i love it if you can give a hold command, than neak by the guards and then tell the escortee to follow and he just keeps bumpung into the guards and they dont notice him, because they only do if he is following you and not running up to you.

  31. ProRataX NS says:

    Press the kill them all button.

  32. Gary Williams says:

    I know that quest. I hate that quest……!

  33. Silgid says:

    Truly funny.

  34. Satharel says:

    Acting so good, you really are pissed by just watching it 😀

  35. Marcus Jones says:

    Or those stealth quests where the enemy completely ignores your npc companions 🤣

  36. Daryl Borres says:

    Stupid box

  37. marv b says:

    You there! You there! You there! You there!

  38. marv b says:

    Alan has a ring.

  39. Christian Mark Gerard Tuvera says:

    shade awayyyyy

  40. DngnRdr says:

    It's almost as bad when they make yourescortee invisible to the enemies… really breaks immersion to see them running right up to a guard with no reaction at all.

  41. da'GELLO says:

    Welp. that's when you let the guards kill the Npc.

  42. Kenny Phanyane says:

    LOL I've haven't had a good laugh like I did today. The way he panicked saying the woods are scary!🤣🤣🤣

  43. James Saltmarsh says:

    Adams acting is genius 😂 he plays that character so well!

  44. 40 02 says:

    God I love that "You There !" spam .

  45. Ravenaxis says:

    Hahaha i want the Epic Annoying Cry for my watssap ringtone so badly! xDDD

  46. Tazzy B says:

    Lorrrrdt!! The screams of terror made me laugh so hard 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 He was born to play these parts 😂

  47. David E says:

    Dead men tell no tales… just like episten who didnt kill himself

  48. Xendar2007 says:

    How did you guys create so many Alans, is evil magic involved? 🤔

  49. SheyD78 says:

    While my last escort quest wasn't stealth based, I totally sympathise with this. Because FK that douchebag who keeps dying unless I take all agro and die myself. BASTARD!!

  50. Jason Nisanov says:

    Morning, nice day to get caught Huh-ha

  51. GrinningLolita says:

    You forgot the part where they activate every trap, block your way and almost kill themselves several times before glitching out and making you restart the whole fucking level 🙃

  52. Сергей Устиненков says:

    о да. Помню в Драгонс Догма сопровождал путников, так они не хотели совсем жить. постоянно убегали и умирали. Только одного довел до конца =(

  53. Stefan Lippeck says:

    Please don't translate titles into german in an english video

  54. Joe Carrillo says:

    Escort missions are the WORST!!!🙃🙃🙃

  55. Joe Carrillo says:

    When you said buttons it sounded like buttholes 😅😅😅

  56. Belairstarcraft says:

    "What are we?" Escorts! "And what do we do?" …hmmm ya … we escort people. Sooo? "LETS GO ESCORT HIM!"

  57. Allan Hall says:

    Murder him and drag his corpse to the finish line. You man not get a quest complete but it would feel soooooo good.

  58. Cody Koh says:

    Its like the saving John Keeshan quest where he walks straight dab in the middle of the orc army

  59. Sonic Crash says:

    OMG I wish Shut the Fu** UP!! really worked

  60. Ikmalreza 1998 says:

    This is why I subscribe.

  61. Alteric Jeske says:

    This reminds me so much of A Plague Tale, where the npcs you were with could be spotted by guards, it was so annoying when you were trying to hide from a guard and the npc suddenly decided to pop up and run off, catching the attention of the guard.

  62. Raymond Morgan says:

    Like ANY follower in Skyrim!!

  63. Chu Qingyan says:

    Like when it’s the final stealth part and you’re hiding in the bushes and suddenly the NPC comes up to you and activates a dialogue and all the troops just notice you and try to Attack you but they can’t cos it’s not in their code to Attack someone in a dialogue and they just do the weird in and out moving around thing and you can see them in the background and as soon as you exit the dialogue they all charge at you and kill you

  64. Kristin FROST Lazerbeams says:

    Adam is a natural. 😂😊

  65. Kostyantyn Artemov says:

    Nice 🙂

  66. TheAngryAArdvark says:

    This reminds me of when you release prisoners in Assassin's Creed, and then they run around for 30 min yelling at the top of their voices.

  67. Ivan A says:

    I hate this cry. 😀 Genius.

  68. kaan özşahin says:

    Please… You need to rush. If you play the right game, your npc will teleport near you. So all you need to do is, running until you reach the quest destination. Warframe escorting mission, after opening the cell, everybody will run to the exit.

  69. Raern corner production says:

    The very first time I did an escort quest I had tried to sneak past, I tried to avoid getting attack after that I just started this The best thing to do when you are doing an escort quest is to forget about being stealthy, just stay head of them just enough that you can kill everything before they get there and hope that they do not run into the middle of even more while you are dealing with the ones you are fighting.

  70. GoldenBeast236 says:


  71. James Moore says:

    How I feel with any escort quest ever.

  72. Morie says:

    I like how he's vibrating everytime he's a npc😂

  73. Ryan Rai says:

    This video really really is relatable

  74. Zanderz says:

    I like how every guard is allan

  75. [Insert Name] says:


  76. Banzai Pineapple says:

    Why do they always wander TOWARDS the guards? 😆👍

    Such great content all 💙

  77. Mr.Wombatti says:

    Where do you guys buy your props for the videos? I mean costumes and swords and stuff like that.

  78. Kyle Cope says:

    Wait, all the guards are Alan…

  79. Pan Darius Kairos says:

    He should have killed the npc.

  80. Tom Knapp says:

    You guys should make one on an impossible amount of loot (like a great axe or armor) from a tiny creature.

  81. Justin Jenkins says:

    We need to start a GoFundMe to make eugene an actual character in a few rpgs.

  82. Mulyana X says:

    Dragon dogma escort mission, the stupid npc just keep going to battle area…. 🤣

  83. WPM Vinictus says:

    Also annoying is when the NPC walks really slowly, then gets aggroed by enemies 5km away and begins running ten times faster towards them. Flawless game design 😀

  84. chen yu says:

    that why i need a group

  85. FoxtheImpersonator says:

    His cry is scream at 1:43 is leaving me in stitches! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

  86. MrFedoraFilm says:

    Escort Quest: You must escort Eugene through the wild woods, but you must use stealth to sneak pass the guards.
    -Quest reward:… I don't know.

  87. John Matteson says:

    The way he's walking & twitching ' Stealth is my middle name. I lost it hahaha .

  88. Jacob Guinsbourg says:

    Best crying npc ever

  89. MiA Mi says:

    The laugh says it all

  90. Aidryan Robert says:

    Lydia flash backs

  91. DanC says:


  92. Reyori says:

    When Adam starts crying very loud I just thought how it sounded like some sort of alarm system.
    Imagine Eugene's crying sound as a car alarm system or a burgler/fire alarm.
    Would be such a life improvement. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  93. KidouKenshi22 says:

    I was waiting for the legendary cry and l didnt get dissapointed.

  94. watwhy says:

    1:43 uhu uhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu uhu uhu

  95. Frederico Colucci Goulart de Salvo Souza says:

    I thought those Zelda chicks summoning seeing this. Complete harmless until snap and Cry for Help. I mean 'For King and Country^^' save that poor countryman there 🙂

  96. TesVixen says:


    I'm dying!

  97. surothedeath says:

    "2:04" Me: SKIP

  98. Kendrick Vickers says:

    The worst escort quest i ever had was in metro 2033 in d6

  99. Белка Моталка says:

    качественные пародии выходят, а качественных рпг не было со времен ведьмака 3

  100. Cyridian Winkler says:

    If only questgivers could be killed :/

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