Most Hilarious Martial Arts Techniques Ever

Most Hilarious Martial Arts Techniques Ever


Russians are some tough people These guys though might prove to be the exception when wing-chun goes to Russia here’s what vodka does to it While exhibitionists think of their bodies as art this video artfully teaches you how to use a man’s ego against himself [laughing] In this fight a capoeira fighter shows that he has some cool kicks that can sometimes backfire oh [laughing] [crowd laughing] Oh [crowd laughing] Ken Shamrock is one of the pioneers of mixed martial Arts and UFC In this later fight in his career his opponent has quite a move for him. Let’s watch And of course Shamrock wins What if you have one guy holding you from behind and another about to attack from the front? How would you deal with that? Step behind and on the other side and then stand up And this is going to use this guy against this guy Wait how did that just happen? Let’s watch it again when I stand up and hope you can see his body start to shift when I stand up quickly He’s going to go flying and this foot is gonna depending on how close this guy is is gonna come up and hit him right in the schnoogies here right in the schnoogies here. I’m not sold Army man I don’t think I would be able to make the guy’s foot go into the other guy’s schnoogies. [Oom-pah music] For those of you who disobeyed your Sunday school teacher or slept in Sunday school you do not want to mess with these nuns Just look at the power in that chop and check this out bam don’t want to be hit by her and Look at them all of the nuns in this convent going through all these kicks and punches Wow, and look at this they even do throws my God look at that judo throw ow right in the schnoogies if you’re an atheist Watch out Here’s a good tip you want to just slow-mo anything you want to make look badass [Oom-Pah music] Flawless just flawless let’s go to the east this definitely embodies the Samurais spirit [yelling] check this guy [yelling] Don’t know what this is All right screw that let’s go to the internal martial arts. Look at these guys honing their Chi or their Kai or whatever they’re honing. Oh wow they can even control this guy wow And whoa force field time! Oh My God he’s convulsing. Now the women try. Ooo ouch ouch ouch. It didn’t work on the ladies. Oh My God, I guess this internal martial art doesn’t work with the ladies This guy on the other hand his chi is able to- look at this he can whoa do these back bends Making her dance Forget ecstasy or LSD Wow He’s got some power right here. He okay. She’s jumping like a little bunny Hitting the wall. Oh he’s going through a door. He’s showing us through a door now. This is a oh Woah woah woah Wow, so his power is able to be transferred through a door. Look at this. She’s convulsing His powers he can’t even control his powers anymore. He’s so he’s so oh my God hope this lady doesn’t die what did you do to her you little chi Master and finally let’s um see what happens when you’ve combined Michael Jackson moves with Karate or whatever martial art this is [laughing] I guess these are moves for the bedroom. I assume I don’t know [yelling] [laughing] This looks like a standard martial-Arts promotional video, but then something funny happens in the background Let’s zoom in work at that pace for a while and then quickly dude learn to catch man come on ruining the shot there This cutie pie is teaching women how to defend against guys. Now the sexual tension is palpable You can literally palp it look at that. It’s almost like the beginning of a porno So this technique right here involves an eye poke. So now she does it Ow! Hey, hey, hey don’t actually poke him in the eye. You’re practicing come on. Here’s what to do if someone pulls your ponytail [yelling] [yelling] Man, if I ever just heard that yell in real life I’d probably cut off my own head [yelling] [yelling] This next one is the master of all fails Some sort of wing chun person teaching you how to defend against Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu guys There’s a top comment that says it better than I do Quote not a single BJJ takedown was attempted that day Absolutely charging into someone and rolling over is not a takedown He’s doing his nunchucks inside which you know is just not a good idea, and he’s gonna wish that cap he’s wearing were a helmet This next guy is doing basketball dribbling moves with his nunchuck. You know he’s got some skill right there Ouch. If at first you don’t succeed try again [laughing] Told you! Don’t do it at home! Yes, his little daughter just called him out This next guys got two nunchucks wow look at it Looks like having two nunchucks didn’t even prepare you for the ultimate attack. Ooh! And let’s end with this oldie. This is probably one of the most original ones. Ow face plant right there. And he keeps trying he keeps trying! Ooooh! Don’t ever smirk unless you can really pull it off all right look at that smirk right there. You’re just asking to be face planted A plus for effort though he keeps going [crashing noise] My God are you ok? Oom-Pah music Why are these guys slapping the heck out of each other? Well it turns out This is actually the national sport of Bangladesh and Nepal this contact fighting originated in India and it’s popular throughout Southeast Asia and Iran I have no idea if these people from Philadelphia were inspired by South Asian Slap fighting But if they were they have a long way to go let’s get professional here Here’s a ninjutsu experts deadly technique [loud yelling continuous] So, what did we just see? Ladies and gentlemen you’re about to witness without doubt the most savage and terrifying self-defense form known to man According to you right, what if you’re trying to run away? But your attacker chases you and what if he or she runs faster than you do. What are you gonna? Do if he or she is about to catch up? Just when you hear that He’s right on your tail right about ready to reach out and grab all you’re gonna Do is just drop down in a fetal position like this now He’s not expecting this so when you drop down, and he’s still running He’s gonna fall over you and when he falls over you you’re in a control position He’s trying to figure out how to get his balance back Well becoming a turtle is now becoming fashionable in self-defense, and you know as a kid I actually did this one time I was playing a game of tag and I fell and I cut my legs and arm But the person trying to catch me fell over me and hurt himself, too So I guess as a kid I was a self-defense master [Oom-Pah music] This old-school self-defense tutorial teaches women the basics on how to defend themselves. It is filled with Hilariously bad acting and some epic techniques. Let’s take a look anticipate a potential problem Get up and walk away So that guy with this crazy mullet has been thwarted But what if he were more physical? give a hard Twisting pinch to the soft skin on the inside of the thigh. It may not look much But there are a lot of nerves in that area And it can really hurt what if you’re a student on a college campus and a guy in an ugly trench coat hits on you Now talking is one thing but touching is another and a satchel full of books makes a formidable weapon Her anger and indignation are used swiftly and positively While exhibitionists think of their bodies as art this video artfully teaches you how to use a man’s ego against himself [laughing] Let’s go back to the park bench and see what you should do if someone gropes you from behind Now a two-handed attack directly from behind it’s surprisingly easy because the attacker leaning over you is partly off-balance watch it again. And finally, it’s not a good self-defense video unless it has at least one technique on how to handle the rare naked choke. The first thing to do with this kind of arm lock is to turn your head to the side This relieves the pressure on your windpipe and lets you breathe then counter-Attack [Oom-Pah music]

Dereck Turner

100 thoughts on “Most Hilarious Martial Arts Techniques Ever

  1. Fight Commentary Breakdowns says:

    Thank you all for your hilarious comments! Glad you were entertained by this comedic critique πŸ˜‰
    Here are some of the techniques that we commentated on:
    For the Fine Russian martial arts in the beginning: "Π‘ΠΎΠΉ Π½Π° Π±Π΅Π³Ρƒ"- Π’iomechanics of Bely Samoryad. https://youtu.be/GRosPMyotj4
    Women's self defense: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RheEsGxi6Ac
    Capoeira slips (Ken Tran vs Marcus Aurelio): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBqOxbepQF0
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVoF5VdLH4U
    Dark Souls roll: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDOndQqtzqk
    Chicken wing defense: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unaGxGRMcJo
    Nun Fu: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MhAran1hQEk
    Japanese ninja parody: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42XG15vUAn0
    Yellow bamboo fail: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TVR67ApSXY
    Black chi master: https://youtu.be/i8HVsbZ-Ey0
    For the African dance fighting: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msbDSmO10N0
    Guy who couldn't catch the keys: https://youtu.be/CryZ1uFPA-0
    Lady with palpable tension: http://escapeandsurvive.com/home.html
    Accidental eye poke: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_4BXy8tLZc
    Defend your pony tail: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9o-nplopP1E
    Wing Chun responds to BJJ: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c8SAHJ7C6U
    First nunchuck fail:
    Basketball dribbling nunchuck fail: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5aEBJOo-Is
    Guy called out by daughter during nunchuck fail: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ljvwt9Zp2mc
    Guy kicked in balls despite nunchucks: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHFH0mDMync
    Afro-Ninja: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEtIoGQxqQs
    Kabaddi: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szrof4WJsKw
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5kF5qmv0q4
    Philly street slap: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijRh9CG5pTo
    The best forbidden technique ever: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Xw5wjwVkFc
    Running away defense turtle: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BeD_SeMBuWo

    I will add to these as I find more! To see more hilarious videos critiquing funny techniques, please go here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtdbPxlsaM_mrpN75fQtCa3lUO5DM4Py5

  2. gemini1 says:

    The music alone is entertaining πŸ˜„

  3. Tucker Latham says:

    "It may not look [sic] much, but there are a lot of nerves in that area and it can really hurt." Because, you know, the would-be rapist is totally going to be paralyzed by that maneuver.

  4. josef marthe says:

    those nuns were doing all these different art forms..what the fuck? lmfao power of jesus and these fist have come to make you repent

  5. Miguel Hernandez says:

    hard pinching on the inner thigh! Lol

  6. Diana Zaragoza says:

    ok matthew gray gubler LMAO,,

  7. Forest Jones says:

    Most likely defensive tech to work: ponytail defense

  8. A Frosch says:

    6:14 That's why nunchakus are forbidden in some countries.

  9. weird science says:

    The nuns look like witches having a fight sister touvhed a mans cock with a fist that must be a sin and they were just creep af sorry i went to catholic school that shit killed me πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  10. TebowJitt says:

    might have the most ads ive seen on a singular under 15 min video. thatd be a little wack even if it was your content. maybe relax a lil?

  11. Destroyer 645 says:

    i love the "defence against a rear choke" hey, have you ever been choked out before?! what you are saying to do would only be worse than passing out.
    lol

  12. c.campbell says:

    2:32 nun-jas

  13. Paul TheSkeptic says:

    It seems to me that a lot of these could be summed up as "When you're attacked from behind, beat the shit out of them. When someone grabs your ponytail, step to the side, then beat the shit out of them. And you don't really NEED to step to the side. As long as step 2 is executed, step 1 is optional."

  14. AT M says:

    Nuns sruns… I would like to see a rabbi to try the same.

  15. vishesh kumar says:

    4:05 that's the ticklejustu, you idiot. How dare you make fun of it?

  16. motorcity Mayhem says:

    russian wing chun slapfest

  17. Eve Fit says:

    Learn how to actually fight and do a bunch of bad things to ur opponent. And if u carry a gun skip these steps.

  18. Bles says:

    Right in the snoogies

  19. Trevor Reed says:

    I laughed so hard I about pissed my self. send over to North Dakota I'll give them them some judo lessons lmfao

  20. Mark Alexander Maron says:

    1:17 guy got his move bob of tekken

  21. Mark Alexander Maron says:

    That guy who groped didnt mind getting thrown though. His hands wete full

  22. ArchetypalHigh says:

    I can confirm 8:35 works. I used to do that to my sister all the time in the park as a kid lol

  23. David Burns says:

    its called meth martial arts?

  24. Sandrock Custom says:

    5:27 is the best technique in this video

  25. Jarred Reneau says:

    2:18 Lol! Who is attacking nuns?…I thought God said, "Vengeance is mine saith the Lord" See!! He said it!

  26. RBG Philosophy says:

    5:49
    This is called South Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and he is doing what is known as a Self-takedown.

  27. RBG Philosophy says:

    10:46
    Professor been keeping these special RNC escape moves from us!!

  28. naruto uzumaki says:

    I like the one with the shnuggies

  29. Thomas Hurl Hi says:

    If anyone checkd the. Ommdnts 2st dont waste your life watching this shit

  30. unsure of what planet im on says:

    3:24 after smashing this poor women over instead of helping her like any sane person would he lays on the ground and pretends to basically have a seizure

    Fucking asshole

  31. Leonardo Polato says:

    7:59 calm down tiger

  32. stephen pack says:

    It seems to me that anyone that tries any of these techniques will get themselves into a much more dangerous situation…if not badly beaten

  33. Adam Wilson says:

    The fighting nuns was definitely a turn on

  34. Nino Johnson says:

    BEST TECHNIC OF ALL IS PICK UP YOUR CEL AND DIAL 911 WAY BETTER THAN ANY OF THIS MARTIAL ARTS πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  35. Morgan says:

    God, if a chick laughed at my junk like that it would just encourage me.

  36. Ben McLeod says:

    10:30 is classic.

  37. keisha boors says:

    I had to stop for a moment just to comment that this actually made me laugh hahaha. Great job. Subbing

  38. Irv Gotti says:

    Bruhh you gotta watch this guy smh
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHulf7_21qY

  39. Lily Hughes says:

    what a load of crap

  40. MMFAN says:

    7:53 When your shin finds the edge of the coffee table at 4am.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  41. Candace Lee says:

    The only people that look like they know wtf they are doing is the nuns lol.. must be that inner why am I doing this to myself 😈 no disrespect I’m in awe of the discipline a human can have over human nature 😘

  42. luis martinez says:

    243 thats a real throw and this is how you really fight….. she can do that….. you can do that too….. judo throw.

  43. First Last says:

    Where do you find the clips

  44. Darth Rangus says:

    The Nuns are the only legit fighters, lol

  45. Cody Evans says:

    Those martial arts moves are funny.

  46. agus ros Hendrawan says:

    WEAK CHUN, TAI CHIT, WU SHUT ..and all of those FAKE CHINA martial art KUNG FOOL…

  47. mr donk says:

    I laughed sooo much. How do actually spell snookies….

  48. Chris Austin says:

    Oh boy

  49. Jane Ross says:

    That exhibitionist laugh defense is the worst idea. These are not exactly normal kinds of weirdo we're talking about. They will probably enjoy it. It will probably encourage them.

  50. AllBlind808 says:

    8:38 would actually work

  51. Jr Pueyo-Morales says:

    I don't know why I'm back, but hey, still funny as before. Specially the vodka infused wing chun.

  52. Messias Pereira says:

    Brilliant video man.so funny

  53. David ζ±ͺ HΓ₯kansson says:

    Hahaha that ζ°£bullshit https://youtu.be/omyOeHlDG9c?t=185 is from a swedish hippie convention that they have in a hick town every year. That clip is from a documentary about that convention. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1173922/

  54. Kao Vang says:

    Omg I could have so done one of these funny ass vid. That shit would have been soo funny.

  55. Phil Lauritzen says:

    β€œRelieves the pressure on your wind pipe and let’s you breathe.” Right, cause that’s what knocks you out in a rear naked choke. The lack of air. πŸ™„

  56. Sheldon Bass says:

    These deadly techniques are greatly appreciated. I have practiced each manuever demonstrated in this video, and feel quite confident I can take on any-bunny…rabbit. ☺

  57. johnny botwright says:

    Prepare For The Return Of The Giants with Steve Quayle Pt1https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_lMMj1Vt2E

    A Big Secret in the Video Description, That Concerns You, READ SEE IT, BEFORE ITS TO LATE Thanks for sharing Great Content,

  58. johnny botwright says:

    Prepare For The Return Of The Giants with Steve Quayle Pt1https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_lMMj1Vt2E

    A Big Secret in the Video Description, That Concerns You, READ SEE IT, BEFORE ITS TO LATE Thanks for sharing Great Content,

  59. adukuttan rocks says:

    'Here's what vodka does to it' ,I see what you did there.

  60. Chance says:

    1:04 Dark Souls

  61. Ultimate 1 says:

    Nun-chucks

  62. Rayne Shadows says:

    "wow right in the shnuggies"
    "If your an atheist, better watch out"
    HAHAHA

  63. Paul Scott says:

    Slapping kung poo these are so funny then there's motion air attacks pathetic how do these people have a gym why did you knock that woman onto the floor then start having a pretend fit moon walking karate ha ha LMAO

  64. Efekan says:

    1:25 just do a dropkick?

  65. wilco weeghel says:

    whahahaha bro what is wrong with you?
    the nuns where doing jiu jitsu and karate

  66. RedMedBd says:

    7:28 it is not Bangladeshi. subtitle says Punjab. also there is something written in Urdu. probably a Pakistan sport of some sort. Good video tho.

  67. Jericho Beach says:

    Neve Campbell 5:02

  68. Sheepdog Sherlock says:

    8:45 this actually does work believe it or not, though you'd want more control vs a fetal position. The guy who taught me Judo did something similar to a man who was aimlessly running at punching people at time square during the new years ball drop. Once the guy ran at him, he quickly dropped causing the attacker to flip and the angry crowd began to beat his ass for having punched them. It is also effective in Judo competitions to grab by the collar amd twist and drop at the same time causing the opponent to flip over.

  69. CM3.Redeye says:

    Gotta say those "nuns" have pretty tight form…

  70. pawned pawned says:

    πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  71. kakarot songoku says:

    Lmao the kinetic energy master has one student

  72. Tyrollin says:

    My God look at that judo throw, ow! Right in the snoogies..

  73. Hidden Nepal says:

    WTF!!! Study before you talk too much. It's not a National sport Of Nepal. πŸ’©πŸ’©πŸ’©πŸ’©πŸ’©πŸ’©πŸ’©πŸ’©πŸ’© Before this I was injoying your video. You become same like thoes shit Masters.

  74. Steven Hair says:

    3:03 – This is a very ancient and powerful martial arts technique. Its called the "fart fan" technique. You will never be able to gas this man out in battle.

  75. REVMr SubG3N3 says:

    That very last one… "How to help your rear naked choker". lol

  76. Enter Tai Chi says:

    Thanks for sharing! Have an awesome day!

  77. Elpat Gorni says:

    I love those nuns, for real! Keep it up, ladies!!!

  78. MAPS MARTIAL ARTS PHILOSOPHY STATION says:

    β€œWhen Wing Chun goes to Russia, here’s what vodka does to it.” Hilarious quote. That was epic bro. Hilarious πŸ˜‚

  79. Ben Richards says:

    Nuns fighting off lust filled monks.!!πŸ˜‚

  80. Joshua Spector says:

    rear naked choke is that easy? man, imma go be mma champion before they all learn this. πŸ˜€

  81. sada elzil says:

    πŸ˜„πŸ‘

  82. kacyis gone says:

    I'm going to vag kick you LOL I'm 32 now I've been a martial artist since I was 8 years old find a real school stop listening to dumbasses and think you're going to get there in a year LOL nobody gets a black belt in a year not if it's real. Looks like all these people got it the same day total inept incompetence, noobs LOL you're not awake until you actually get punched in the face.

  83. Mike Sowder says:

    West Philadelphia slapped then hazed on the internet instead of gym is where I spent most of my days snaking out acting like a fool when a couple of fighters who wanted to prove I didn't know what I was doing in my neighborhood got my ass kicked one time and my mom laughed her ass calling my auntie and uncle in bel air saying your nephew is a dipshit got kicked into the air.

  84. Lamar Fresquez says:

    Narrator ruins the video

  85. uiquedmilk says:

    3:44 teaches you how to dodge bullets

  86. BAGINDA BAGINDA says:

    6:54
    That's the most despicable face I have ever seen

  87. Nate Ellis says:

    8:24 this move also works when you are playing defense in high school soccer, when you are charging your opponent but he is not afraid of you because he knows he can dribble an you can't. Right before you collide with him drop down turning your back towards him and he will trip over your back, landing on his back out of bounds, he will call foul but you did not actually hit him, he hit you so than he will have to serve the ball to his other teammates who can't dribble but it will all be good because everyone on your team but you has awesome dribbling skills because you go to a school that is %65 mexican and your coach is letting great soccer players who graduated last year play. . : )

  88. datsuntoyy says:

    Nuns fighting, only way to top that is add some jello.

  89. Edgardo Carrasquillo says:

    What a disgrace

  90. Whitney Allen says:

    Blew the chi right out of her keister.

  91. Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez says:

    The Capoeira guy's legit af.

  92. John Smith says:

    Watch out atheists!

  93. Taegers Inc. says:

    The clip starting at 2:50 (Japanese tv show) is supposed to be a comedy bit. The black master Chi at 3:34 is actually performing an exorcism. πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚

  94. MinionDX says:

    Wait, the army dude's techniques are actually good though. Maybe not the whole, "get the guy to kick his buddy," part, but we were taught to shift laterally if your arms are being held behind your back. You're just trying to take them off balance and fall to the ground essentially. The restrainer will instinctively let go of the hold to catch themselves or risk landing on their head.
    Also, there's a similar defense that I wouldn't recommend anyone try unless you absolutely have no choice, but if you're being held hostage via knife to your throat or gun to your head, attacker behind you, firmly grasp the weapon, and "get long" my instructor would call it. Basically you just bend over and shove your ass into their pelvis, while outstretching your arms (that are holding the attacker's weapon), extending the weapon beyond their reach.
    Anyways, good vid, I know the intent is to highlight the humor, just wanted to point out those couple are actually effective πŸ™‚

  95. Langolier says:

    Twice double ads … Your Kung Fu is fucked up.Β Never turning back to this channel again πŸ™‚

  96. 73DIABLO73 says:

    πŸ™„πŸ€­

  97. Yarin Al says:

    8:00 stop stop hes already dead

  98. King Blizz says:

    I fucking love these videos u make bro I could be having the shitiest day and I watch this and it makes my day

  99. The Unknown Show says:

    That russian technique is something that would be used when you want to end the fight quickly.

  100. Kenny Rapata says:

    I am so fucking disgusted with these so-called 'Martial Arts Masters' teaching people how to get killed by using fucking shitty bullshit techniques… I have Been doing WingChun for 5 years and it has saved my life a few times with people and people yielding weapons…. And when I see these Video's it destroys the morale of the Martial Arts circle and turns it into a fucking Laughing stock.. makes me wanna travel to these places one by one and fuck shit up.. not impressed man!!

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